I'll fight for love, for You

Lately, I've been feeling really torn.

The past three months of my life have been amazing.  God has cracked my frozen heart, so deeply focused on my unworthiness that I had been missing out on so much of His plan for me. In seeking Him, I have truly found the treasure of knowing Christ in deeper ways that I didn't know I was capable of.  The past year and a half has been a period of tremendous awakening in my life and I am so thankful for that.

Accepting Christ into my life was the best decision that I have ever made and will ever make.  Knowing Christ has completely changed my perspective on this world, my life, and everything in it...

But along with Christ comes pain.

The pain of not feeling understood, 

not feeling accepted, 

being questioned, 

feeling boxed in by a world that can sometimes seem so pointless,

feeling spotlighted by the world that turns their back on Him and points at you for stepping out.

I have realized that in accepting Jesus into my heart, I have not accepted an easy thing.  Just take a look around and what do you see?  

People that would rather watch "Jersey Shore" than have a deep conversation.  High schools like my own where expectations exist for people in new relationships to have sex within a few weeks.  A place where celebrities in the media are glorified and divorce is almost expected within a few months of marriage.  A country where the cross of Jesus is worn on necklaces but forgotten and pushed aside in their actual lives.

I shake my head sometimes and sadly look around.

Maybe it isn't possible God...so much hurting, so many fallen, where do we even begin?

Where can I even begin Lord?

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart, I have overcome the world." { John 16:33 }

I have accepted the love that challenges me to spread the news of Him no matter what.

No matter what family members say.

No matter what friends say.

No matter what people think of me or say about me.

No matter what the cost to my reputation or image.

No matter how far against the grain of this world I go, Jesus is worth every ounce of who I am and the life that is within me.

Thinking about this, I found a quote that describes it well, only in a different context.

"So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day..."-The Notebook

Noah and Allie are the picture of what so many of us want: somebody who loves us so dearly that they are willing to fight for love, fight for us.

The amazing thing is that God's love for us is so much bigger than any brand of human love.

His furious, deep, passionate, and searching love seeks us in our brokenness, unrelenting and consistently.  God loves us, broken and scarred through our pain.  The thing is His love is not a one-way street.

Is God worth it? Is he worth the effort of loving back?

Is knowing God worth the criticism, the struggles, the jokes, the questions, the challenges that many of us face every single day?  Should I just turn away from His call for me because the going gets tough and people shell me with criticism?

Is Jesus so deeply rooted in my identity that His love is enough to persevere?

In my heart, God is my everything.  If this is true, then I am willing to lay these things down at the throne and take the hits. 

I'm willing to testify for Jesus, showing to this world the most precious gift my heart has or will ever receive.  He deserves to be fought for.

He deserves the highest spot above all things in my life and I am going to continue fighting for that day in and day out.

God is worth it.

He's worth every heartache, every blow, every single tear that falls to the ground.

I have felt so alone in my faith at times and you are NOT alone if you have.

Following Christ means entering through a narrow gate, only to lead to the rich and beautiful expanse of God's kingdom (Matt. 7:13)

The darkness of sin in our world may threaten my heart, but God's love overcomes it no matter how many times it overshadows my faith.

"The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it." 

{ John 1:5 }

Are you willing to fight to bring light to this world? To speak the truth no matter how much it stings?

What about to your friends, your family, your boyfriend/girlfriend, your team, your campus?

I am. 

And I'm willing to fight to bring the Kingdom with every last tear and fight that is inside of me.  The people here deserve to know truth, to know God, and they will never know unless we show them.  Every day when challenges arise, remember that Christ has overcome on our behalf.  

1 John 4:19 says, "We love because he first loved us."  I dedicate myself to loving this world with a fire on Christ's behalf because we are the candle flame destined to reignite this world for Christ.  This world will know the goodness of God through the Christ followers who step up and take a stand. We are the light.

I'll fight for love, for You.

In Your name, Amen.